The name of Benjose gives you a clever, quick, analytical mind, but you suffer with a great deal of self-consciousness, lack of confidence, and much aloneness because of misunderstandings. Feeling inadequate in creating closeness and harmony in close relationships, you could become insecure, jealous, withdrawn, and repressed, and could suffer loneliness. There are times when you experience inner turbulence at your inability to say what you mean. Your feelings run deep and you crave love and affection but, because you seldom share your thoughts, others find it difficult to understand your needs, even if they wish to make you happy. You find pleasure in literature, in poetry, and in your ideals and will turn to them when you feel you have been misunderstood. You crave peace and tranquillity, but seldom attain it, although you may find a degree of mental freedom when you go out into nature. Although self-conscious in front of people, when you put on a costume you could excel at performing arts, even to the point where you lose a sense of reality. You tend to be secretive and noncommittal about private matters, yet at times you will talk effusively in order to hide your self-consciousness or to lead others away from personal subjects. You crave affection but seldom find anyone who understands your nature. You are inspired by encouragement from others, yet suspicious of their intent.
